Hey, Shawn Kemp Can Still Ball … Sorta September 27, 2007
Posted by TheHype in Old School, Videos , add a comment |
I can’t believe I’m putting this under “Old School” but man, it’s been such a long time for Mr. Reign (Rain?) Man. It’s just not the same without you big guy. Anyways, I stumbled upon a rather interesting “mix” of a totally not-that-fat Shawn that’s dated about a year ago over at YouTube (no embedding tho). Like many of the commenters there said, he can do all that probably because he’s playing against 15 year olds.
But still, it looks mighty sweet, especially those passes. However, I object to the mixer-guy for including that off the knee steal as a “highlight”. Come on man, it’s Shawn Kemp, give him some dignity.
So, even though I couldn’t get that video here, I’ll put another one—where’s he battling a vagina monster in an old Reebok ad, enjoy:
Hubie Brown Will Yell At You If You Don’t Read These Links
Posted by TheHype in Linkage , 1 comment so far |
We welcome you back to our normally scheduled programming that will probably not be on schedule the moment this post ends. Here are you required readings of the day class. Pop quiz next week, so read up:
Sebas unearths the greatest Chuck moments. I’d say everyday he’s still talking is the greatest Chuck moment. (The Half Court Heave)
Matt Bernhardt goes all introspective for the big 5-0 edish of the NBA Carnival, so it’s kind of like a Kanye West album, except, with links instead of lyrics… music… or sound… so… it’s actually nothing like a Kanye West album. (Blog a Bull)
Kevin Broom’s story about his “chat” with Hubie Brown is so awesome it’ll break the Awesome Meter™, and I agree with Kevin, even the way he tells the story, making it seem like the Hube went a lil’ koo-koo, I still love H-Brown (The Secret Weapon)
Would doesn’t love a mustache ride? (The Blowtorch)
Speaking of mustaches, check out this amazingly exhaustive break down of the Southeast by Ziller, seriously, the only thing he missed in that recap & analysis are maybe how the popcorn tastes at different arenas—it’s so good. (Ballhype Featured: NBA Festivus) …er, the mustache comment will all make sense when you check it out…
M-Cuban Busts A Move Son September 26, 2007
Posted by TheHype in Dallas Mavericks, TV Shows, Videos , add a comment |
Mark Cuban, not pictured on the left dancing with the Rockettes, made his Dancing With the Stars debut last night.
I didn’t watch it, because I have no electricity. Ever. But good for us, the fellows over at Awful Announcing pranced to the video first and gives the world clearly what we were never waiting for
(though honestly: Mark’s awesome in this…)
Troy Hudson’s Greatest Hits September 24, 2007
Posted by TheHype in Golden State Warriors , 1 comment so far |
You may know Troy Hudson is now a Warrior. You may also know T-Hud had a rap album out. You may know a bunch of other stuff that had I am way to lazy to type out.
BUT YOU MAY NOT KNOW that he’s about to drop another hitmaker on his sophomore try (to be released the same day as Mary J. Blige and Mariah Carey’s album drops — synergy baby!)
It’s going to be called “Worrrier” the following are the his singles:
Track Listings
1) Intro
2) Fake Sh*t is Better Than No Sh*t At All
3) True Love pt2: Truer Love Baby
4) So There
5) I’m a Mid-level Gangsta (aka I’m A Cubicle Type of Gang Ish)
(Ok, in the past 48 hrs, I slept probably 3 mins and 32 second. here’s the X-Rated version of what happened: first we—HOLY CRAP Heroes is back and it’s on right now!? Eff storytelling, my inner nerd beckons me!)
Check List: Anna Faris, T-Dot Fun, LJ’s Shot and Gregory Oden September 20, 2007
Posted by TheHype in Linkage, Unrelatedness , 3 comments |
First thing on the agenda: I can’t stress how important this is, in the entire history of everything — my future wife Anna Faris (long sidenote: is there an actress that can play both hilariously funny and straight-up dramatic as her? No, there is not.)… she is going to play Linda Lovelace in an upcoming bio-pic. Yes, that Linda Lovelace … yes … “Deep Throat” … boom! Oh and only one R in Faris? News to me.
Second thing on the list: me. Surely lil’ ol’ Hypez isn’t really Unrelatedness news worthy, but hell with that, it is my creation. ANYWAY. Just wanted to let any Toronto folks out there know (ahem, ahem, ahem, ahem*sorta*) I’ll be invading your city this weekend for a bachelor’s party. Normally it’s the other way around, people come to Montreal for things like this … but we’re feeling crazy! So if you see a cartoon character perpetually spinning that composite ball, that’s me.
Number The Third on the thingy: KD’s probably non-HD or Blu-Ray DVDs stories, a fav:
4Q, .5.7: Not sure if you’ve seen this play before. After catching a tipped in-bound pass, Larry Johnson grabs the ball a good 28 feet from the hoop. After facing up and making one hard dribble to the left, he is grabbed by Antonio Davis. Hearing the whistle, LJ pulls up and nails a 3-pointer. Madison Square Garden shakes quite a bit.
Seriously, who doesn’t remember LJ running back quite excited, then being grabbed by Charlie Ward (or was it Chris Childs? damn, I can never get the Charlie/Chris Childs thing straight— it’s not because they’re black… I swear!) in celebration. But right after, Larry pushes everyone off, signaling to calm down so he can knock in that extra FT, love it.
Fourth: Glad to see Greg Oden video blogging after the surgery. GO, the world will be waiting anxiously for more updates on that bed.
WotS: Joey Crawford Is Back September 19, 2007
Posted by TheHype in Referees, Word on the Streetz , 2 comments |
Referee Joey Crack is reinstated after totally losing it on that televised Spurs game several months ago. Word on the Streetz wonders just when he’ll get kicked out again…
 Tanya Rriggs Magician “I bet he’s going to be gone as soon as he says things like: ‘OMG, WHERE AM I? THE ALIENS WILL SEDUCE US ALL!!!!!’ … or something like that.”  Tom Baker Ice Cream taster “Oh you just know JC (and I’m not talking about Jesus) will try to make up random rules like “Illegal Humming; 7.3 Second Breathing Violation; or Offensive Radio Disruption. The man is nuts!”  Roy Thompson Cirque du Soleil “I’m sure he’ll be thrown out as soon as he tries to kiss Tim Duncan. Yeah… it’ll be awkward for everyone.” |
Move Over Avatar, Charlotte’s Got The Kids’ Angle Now September 18, 2007
Posted by TheHype in Charlotte Bobcats, Photoshopery , 1 comment so far |
And doesn’t the left cheek of the supposed Bobcat (his left) look like a football? Or maybe it’s a scar. No wait! A tattoo … damn he’s a cool cat (tee hee!)
The Official Isiah Thomas Rules of Insultery
Posted by TheHype in Law Breaking, Outrageousness , 3 comments |
“I’ve got ___ … in different area codes … “So I.T. seriously is just letting his mouth talk without even thinking twice huh? Exhibit C: who is and who is not allowed to use the word “bitch”.
Asked if he was bothered by a black man calling a black female “bitch,” Thomas said: “Not as much. I’m sorry to say, I do make a distinction.
“A white male calling a black female a bitch is highly offensive,” Thomas said. “That would have violated my code of conduct.”
Why are we even bringing up such a foul display of immaturity from Thomas for being class-A moron? Well, so that we can open up the vault on what else Isiah Thomas wants to teach us about Proper Usage of Insultery Involving the Word “bitch”
• You CAN’T call someone a “bitch” until after 1:30pm EST
• You CAN call someone a “bitch” if Halo 3 is involved
• You CAN’T use “bitch” just simply as the goto insult in and of itself (for that wouldn’t be creative)
• You CAN use “bitch” in the following way: “Hey, why you gotta bitcherize this poster dude?” or “Man, that shirt is soooo not bitchin’” Variations are encouraged
• You CANNOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE, use “bitch” when it is preceded by these two words of a particular pop song: “It’s Britney, ____ “… only because it’ll just remind us how awful Ms. Spears’ career has become in recent years
• You CAN use “bitch” if you’re in prison, obviously
• You CAN’T use “bitch” when she beats you at Rock Paper Scissors … even when she might do this
• You CAN use “bitch” after watching Deadwood DVDs, but really? That’s like the most tame slur out of everything you can come up with after viewing that incredible show
and finally …
• you CAN’T use “bitch” if you oversleep and miss the bus and then miss an important class and you’re left outside the room screaming UGH! … dude, sleep earlier!
Issue #723589 in Bad Caption of Epic Proportions September 17, 2007
Posted by TheHype in Photoshopery , add a comment |
The culprit? Yahoolio! and Sam Yeh. YEH you!
Witness the comedic genius that bad translations can bring forth which totally makes me just froth at the mouth:
Ode to G-ODE September 14, 2007
Posted by TheHype in Injuries, Portland Trailblazers , 1 comment so far |
By now, the good (or bad) gospel has been out: Greg Oden isn’t going to play in the 2007-2008 NBA season because he’s getting microfacture surgery.
One look around the blogs, the word “depressing” has been used 3257 times, 3258 counting that previous one I just wrote. I’m not a monster, and of course I have feelings, so yes, I’m not disagreeing that it’s a pity for Greg to have to go through this (and fans as well). But what I intend to do here, is to try and keep an upbeat motif so as everyone won’t just cry themselves to sleep.
Here Are The Things Greg Oden Should Do On A Long Year Off:
Go to the fringe festivals and educate himself on alternative arts!
Go and a have a shave, finally
Go and be the spiritual guide to all the young Hollywood crazies out there
Go be super amazing at Halo 3, and then just kick Gilbert Arenas’ team’s e-ass
and ripping off last post: Go back to school?
Try to explain the West...
